


I Dreamt As I Fell

by GrumpyBox



Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One), Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers: Prime
Genre: Gen, Hopefully a happy ending?, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Other, Suicide Attempt, Violence, cause war, empurata in the future, more characters in the future?, poor baby, this will either be really sad or super sad or both, won't be too graphic though
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-23
Updated: 2018-03-25
Packaged: 2019-03-22 21:04:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13772523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrumpyBox/pseuds/GrumpyBox
Summary: Optimus Prime is sent back in time by Primus to stop the war before it started. This would be a great plan if the past played out the same way as it did before, the problem is....it doesn't.





	1. A Meeting With Primus

**Author's Note:**

> Optimus Prime is sent back in time by Primus to stop the war before it started. Oh, and Primus is definitely trying to set Optimus up with Senator Shockwave. Can Optimus stop the war before Cybertron erupts in chaos, or will the war play out the way it did before....or maybe even worse.

Optimus watched as the dying embers of the sun danced across the sky. The sunsets on earth were beautiful here. He had once heard that the sunsets near the acid wastes on Cybertron were quite remarkable as well, but he was certain that they truly could not compare to the beauty of earth.  _ If I were to end it all I’m glad it will be here _ , Optimus thought to himself. For too long, he had listened to the voices of the matrix that bore down his chassis and not to the cries of his own spark. He was aching. Life had become so difficult since the war. He had borne the weight of everyone’s pains and struggles alone. It had made him weak. The responsibility was too great, and he knew something that no one else - not even the primes- would admit. He was never meant to bear the matrix. He only bore this great burden because it was a time of war and he was the most reliable mech available. He could feel, as the war waned onward, how the matrix drew cold inside of him. The voices of the primes became soft over the years, until they were a faint whisper. The matrix that once tugged roughly on his spark, grew rigid. The sky turned to deep hues of blue and indigo as the moon rose above the prime. Optimus stared in awe as the sky sprung with new life and stars began to glitter through the darkness. Prime couldn’t help but wonder if he was making the right decision. His team had always been there for him. Ratchet, although rough and sarcastic on the outside, was actually a great confident who would gladly listen to the Prime’s problems if he ever felt overwhelmed. However, it wasn’t long before Optimus felt guilty for pouring his heart out to the old medic. Ratchet was a friend, certainly, but it must have been overwhelming to hear of the prime’s struggles and try not to take them to heart. It didn’t feel right to Optimus, passing his troubles along to another. Perhaps that was why he was here on this cliffside. The moon was now completely overhead, encompassing the night sky. Optimus had already sent a note to the members of Team Prime. It was simple: Till All Are One. Optimus stood up at the end of the ledge, not daring to look down.  _ Just do it quickly _ , he thought to himself. And with that, he allowed himself to slip off the edge of the cliff. For a moment, it felt like he was flying ….

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


And that’s because he was. 

  
  
  
  


It took Optimus Prime a moment to realize he was no longer falling off of the edge of a cliff, and suspended within the realm of the Primes. He looked around him at the blank whiteness of the realm and couldn’t help but laugh at how much it juxtaposed the rich blackness of the sky he had been falling in.

 

“What do you think you are doing?”

 

Optimus looked left and right until he sensed a presence before him. The presence was void of form or shape. It’s voice held no gender, but instead resonated a power that shook Optimus’ frame to its core.

 

“Do you really believe it would be this easy?”

 

Something about the voice was familiar yet distant at the same time. It was calming and terrifying. What kind of being could cause such emotions to rush through a mech?

 

“Do you truly believe your life matters this little?”

 

Suddenly, a realization washed over Optimus. He was in the presence of Primus. He was in the presence of his creator.

 

“M-my Lord,” Optimus stuttered, “f-forgive me.”

 

“Do not be afraid, my child,” Primus responded. “I am not angry with you….just disappointed.”

 

“My lord?” Optimus could feel his frame trembling as the Prime spoke. He tried his best to control the shaking within his spark, but his efforts were futile.

 

“Not disappointed in you my child, disappointed in me.” Optimus suddenly found himself blanketed in a warmth he had never felt before. He felt an everlasting calm wash over his frame, soothing all of the aches and pains that had been burrowed deep within his spark.

 

“I am so sorry my child,” Primus continued,” I wanted what was best for you. I wanted you to live a full and bountiful life, that’s what I want for all of my children. When this war started,” Primus hesitated at the mention of the war. Primus did their best to choose their words. “When the war started, I thought I could still give the life I had intended to all of my children. I thought the war wouldn’t change the course of their lives that much. I thought all of my children could still live out their lives calling despite the war….but I underestimated how painful war can be. I forgot how fragile my children were.” The warmth that had shrouded Optimus began to dissipate as a chill filled the air around him. Optimus could feel the presence of Primus drawing in on itself. “I wanted you to lead, not because it was your destiny, but because it would help you realize your potential and help others realize their potential through you. I know that the task I have charged you with is a difficult one, but I did not realize how hard it was for you to bear. I did not think you would break underneath the pressure of it all.” Primus paused again. The presence has recoiled into a faint sensation that grazed the outer edges of Optimus’ EM field. He could feel the pain and sorrow that resonated within his Creator’s voice. Optimus couldn’t help but reach out to touch and comfort his creator. “I have broken too many of my children,” Primus began again. “Too many of my children have fallen down this same path as you my child. I will right the wrongs I have caused. We will end this war together.”

 

“But how,” Optimus couldn’t contain his words. It wasn’t his desire to bring any more pain to his creator, but the skepticism of war had been engrained into his spark. Wishful thinking was a thing of the past. In war, one’s grasp of reality dictated their survival. “I have been fighting this war for over four million years, and it may not end even with my passing. It could go on for centuries more until the Decepticons come to reason, or until we have all perished.”

 

Primus’ presence drifted around Optimus pensively. He deeply wished he could speak words of encouragement rather than words of defeat, but the war had snuffed the last bit of optimism within his spark. Optimus searched deep within himself for something encouraging to offer to his troubled creator. Optimus was searching so deep in fact, that he did not hear the words his creator spoke.

 

“I’m sorry, could you repeat that?” Optimus queried as he tried to process what he had just heard.

 

“If we can not the end the war now,” Primus stated,” then we must end the war before it began. Forgive me my child, but I have one last task for you…. if you are willing?” Optimus pondered his situation. He had fought this war for over four million years to no avail. He was here with Primus this very moment because he could no longer handle the pangs of war and had decided to rid himself of the struggle. Was he really about to go back just so he could fight a war again? Was he really going to do this to himself? Primus’ last statement was not a challenge, but a genuine question. Optimus could feel within his spak that his creator would respect any decision he had would make. If Optimus refused, then Primus would simply choose another for the task. There was no judgement here. 

 

“I accept,” Optimus said after some time had passed,” I will return to the past.”

 

The room suddenly shone ten times brighter at Optimus’ words. The warmth that had surrounded him grew stronger and the deity laughed to itself. “Thank you my child,” Primus beamed, “I know that the task I ask of you is a difficult one, but do not lose spark. Remember what I have made you to be, remember what you are capable of. I will always be here if you need me, but know that there is a strength that resides within your spark that is more powerful than you may ever realize. Use it when the time comes.”

 

And with that, the room and the presence vanished. Optimus found himself launched through a realm full of vibrant colors and shapes. Images danced around him, some he recognized while others were foreign to him. The walls of the realm vibrated with sound and noise, and suddenly he was there. Lying flat cold on his back. Staring straight up at the stars and moon in the night sky.

 

“What are you doing out here?” A familiar voice called. Optimus slowly forced himself off of the cool ground beneath him. He was surprised to find that it was not dirt like what he had become accustomed to on earth, and there was no daunting cliffside towering behind him. “The temperature has dropped due to our loss of Luna 1. If you are not careful you will catch a virus from the cold.”

 

“You are right,” Optimus said as he brushed himself off,” forgive me old friend.”

 

“Old friend?” A tall white mech with light green and light blue accents stood behind Optimus. His faceplate was warm and inviting. His EM field was full of youth and life as he made his way closer to Optimus. “Who do you think I am, Ratchet?”

 

“You are right, senator,” Optimus barely whispered. A deep longing and sorrow filled his field as he turned to face the mech he had missed for so many vorns.

 

“For the last time Orion, call me Shockwave in private,” the handsome mech said as he cupped Optimus’ faceplate in the palm of his servo.

 

“Yes….Shockwave.”


	2. Optimus Has Fallen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We learn more about what's going on with Optimus and Shockwave makes an appearance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this will be an emotional fic. be prepared to have feels. if you aren't having feels now you will later.

 

Optimus lazily traced a digit along the window sill of his old apartment, or should he say his current apartment. It had been a long time since he had seen his apartment, or Cybertron for that matter. The sun was rising over Iacon city and the streets of his home were beginning to buzz with life. Waste Disposal bots walked along the streets cleaning up whatever garbage had been left over from the prior night’s festivities, and some low level workers scurried out of their homes to beat the morning traffic.

 

“What exactly have you done Primus?” Optimus asked as he made his way around his apartment. Optimus gingerly handled a picture that rested on a mantle near his quaint kitchen. He couldn’t help but smile at the photo of Ratchet and another medic, Pharma if he remembered correctly, guzzling down drinks at Maccadam’s. A wide smile graced the medic’s faceplate, his eyes shone with the same intensity as the drink in his servos. It had been years since he had seen his friend that happy.

 

“I took you back remember?” A warmth encompassed Optimus’ frame as the presence of Primus filled his spark. “I have brought you back to the times leading up to the war, you are no longer a prime.”

 

“What!?!” Optimus stumbled backwards away from the kitchen and towards a mirror. None of this could be real. It can’t be real. Prime rushed to the large mirror of his berthroom and stared in awe and amazement at his frame. He had reverted back to his pre-war frame, he no longer had the mods Ratchet had attached to him throughout the war, and was covered in some kind of strange wax.

 

“You would always wear that wax when you met with the Senator,” Primus cooed within his spark chamber.

 

“I know,” Orion responded roughly,” I remember.” Orion gazed at the beautiful frame before him. There was no blemish or scar to be found on his entire body. Whatever damage the war had caused had disappeared. Orion’s armor gleamed in the rising light that cascaded through the window. His deep set optics of Optimus Prime were now replaced with the vibrant and youthful gaze of Orion Pax. Orion couldn’t help but feel ashamed.

 

“What’s wrong my child?” Primus asked, puzzled by the sudden change in Orion’s field.

 

“It’s...it’s just that I look so young,” the once prime began. “My team is somewhere in the galaxy fighting a- forgive the term- Primus forbidden war while I’m here standing in Iacon City.” Orion trudged into his living room and plopped gracelessly down into a chair.

 

“My child you misunderstand….”

 

Orion felt the presence of his god leave his body. He was confused as to why the deity would leave him in his hour of need when a foreign EM field began to mingle with his own. Orion stood straight up at the sight of the mech that stood before him. The mech was a small blue and white bot that barely reached past his knee caps. Orion had expected the deity to tower over him and be decorated in an array of expensive paints. However, Primus stood before him in a small disposable frame with the words waste disposal written on his forearm.

 

“My child,” Primus said as he intertwined Orion’s large servo with their own, “you are no longer in your time….no one is. I have reset your world to the time before the war. All of your friends….all of you enemies….they do not know the future, they are completely unaware that they have been sent to the past. This is your opportunity to change the future for the better. You can start again and prevent the fall of Cybertron. You are no longer Optimus Prime-leader of the Autobot army and defender of the rights of all sentient beings-you are Orion Pax, former dock worker and current librarian.” Primus paused, allowing Orion to take in everything he was hearing. Orion Pax understood that Primus was a deity, but was any of this even possible? Could he have really traveled back in time? “Do not fear my child,” Primus began again, “I will be here to guide you during your journey. I will use this frame to communicate with you and others. Come, there are many things I must show you if we are to change the past.” Primus ushered Orion out of the door of the small apartment and into the bright light of a now awakened Iacon City.

*************************************************************************************************************

 

Starscream was uncertain of what he hated most, the night shift or having to fly during the night shift. On most occasions, Starscream relished in the ability to glide through the air freely and out of the watchful optic and scrutiny of Lord Megatron. However, Earth was not as temperate as Cybertron or most planets the Decepticons had visited. Depending on where you were in the world, and unfortunately for the Decepticons they were hiding out in a desert, the temperature could drop significantly during the evening causing the air to be frigid and unpleasant to fly in. If Starscream were in his root mode his dentae would be chattering. Despite the cold, Starscream was a capable flier and performed basic maneuvers during his patrol. Starscream was doing a simple barrel roll when the moonlight reflecting off of some metal caught his optic. He gracefully descended to the base of the cliff he had been flying near to inspect the obscurity. Starscream couldn’t believe his optics. He rebooted his visual acuity systems in hopes that the sight before him was a mere glitch within his processor. It wasn’t. The mangled frame of Optimus Prime laid before him. Optimus’ legs and arms were horribly distorted while his chassis took the brunt force of the fall. Optimus lied face down with part of helm was cracked open; a dark pool of energon surrounded the figure. Starscream could tell that the prime had just fallen, there was still some heat radiating off of the frame. If Starscream had known any better, he would say that Optimus was still…..

 

“Oh Primus……” Starscream’s processor was beginning to glitch out rom how fast his spark was racing.

 

<<Lord Megatron!>> Starscream opened up the comm link with haste.

 

<<What is it Starscream? I’m quite busy with->>

 

<<It’s Optimus Prime, my lord.>> Starscream did his best to keep his voice intact as he spoke to his leader. The dimming light of the Prime’s spark was boring into his processor. <<He’s dying! He fell off of a cliff and is mortally wounded. If I didn’t know any better sire, I’d suggest foul play from the Autobots.>>

 

<<Don’t move Starscream, Soundwave and I will be there immediately.>>

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“That is illogical,” Shockwave said when the order was shoved into his servo.

 

“What part? Optimus Prime falling off a cliff or Megatron wanting to fix him?” Knockout retorted. Despite the race car’s usually flamboyant demeanor, Knockout was struggling to compose himself. Everyone aboard the Nemesis was struggling to compose themselves. Optimus Prime, the leader of the Autobot army, was being delivered to their servos mortally wounded. To make matter worse, higher command believed that there was foul play involved.

“Both,” Shockwave replied with his usual monotonous voice,” It is illogical for Lord Megatron to want his greatest enemy repaired, and it is illogical to assume that Optimus Prime fell off of a cliff.”

 

“What are you suggesting, that Optimus Prime jumped off?” 

 

The jest wasn’t meant to elicit an emotion, but Shockwave couldn’t help but feel something boil up within his spark. Shockwave expertly cooled the unwanted feeling. “I am suggesting no such thing. I am simply stating that is illogical to assume that a warrior as skillful as Optimus Prime would find himself in such a predicament.”

 

“Yet, here we are Shockwave,” Knockout said as he placed a servo on his hip joint. “Lord Megatron wants you to follow these procedures to ensure that prime is properly stabilized. Apparently, prime is in such bad condition he needs a miracle of science to save him, not a miracle of medicine.”

 

Shockwave worked swiftly to prepare the medical berth for Optimus’ arrival. Although the mech was practically emotionless, he couldn’t help but feel something- a disturbance perhaps- brewing up within his spark. Despite how hard Shockwave tried, images of a young dockworker found their way into his processor. He did his best to quell them, that is until the battered frame of Optimus Prime was laid on his medical berth. The young dockworker Shockwave knew and the mutilated frame bore no resemblance. Shockwave knew this was no accident.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why do the Decepticons suspect foul play? How does Shockwave know this isn't an accident? What does Shockwave know that the Decepticons don't? Tune in next week.


	3. The Unknown Autobot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Starscream voices his concerns.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry but you won't get as much Orion/Shockwave interaction. I'm still building on what's going on around Optimus.

“How are you feeling today Orion?” Orion jumped slightly at the question. His mind had trailed off during his conversation with Senator Shockwave and he had completely zoned out his words. Orion’s field clouded with confused embarrassment as he scratched a digit along the old bench he and Senator Shockwave were sitting on.

 

“Forgive me Senator, there is a lot on my mind….”

 

“Would you mind sharing them with me. I have noticed the change in your field and would like to help you. You seem confused?”

 

Yes, Orion was confused. A few days ago he was Optimus Prime, leader of the Autobots, who was in the middle of fighting a never-ending war against the Decepticons. He felt like a spectator who had been forced to watch the demise of his entire planet and was unable to act. For years he thought he was acting, four million in fact, as he raged war against the tyrant who had destroyed their home. It wasn’t until recently that he had realized that he was just another pawn placed on the great chessboard of life. Primus had been toying with them all. One day he would fall just like all of his comrades before him, Optimus just decided to die on his own terms.

 

_ Is that really what you believe my child? _

 

“Yes it seems so….” Orion replied.

 

“Hmm. Perhaps you should give your medic friend a call. You may have caught something while lounging about in the cold,” Shockwave took Orion’s servo within his own and stroked the back of his servo. Orion shivered at the gentle touch. It had been so long since Shockwave had touched him, or anyone else for that matter, so tenderly. Orion felt something deep within his spark, something Optimus Prime had worked hard to repress. The feeling made his tank reel within him, he almost felt like-

*************************************************************************************************************

“AWW THAT’S REVOLTING!!!!!”

 

“I warned you Starscream to stay away from my patient.” Shockwave reprimanded as the seeker searched frantically for a cloth to clean himself with.

 

“I didn’t expect him to actually purge!” Starscream finally found a halfway decent rag and proceeded to clean his frame with the utmost scrutiny. Shockwave moved from the medical console he had been working on and back towards Optimus Prime’s unconscious frame. Despite Shockwave’s insistence on leaving Optimus Prime alone to recover, Starscream had made it his goal to find a way to provoke the Prime and Shockwave in his unconscious state. Shockwave was certain the vain seeker simply wanted to offline the prime in an effort to usurp their leader’s commander. At the same time, Shockwave couldn’t help but wonder if the seeker had other motives. Starscream was erratic when he first brought Prime onto the Nemesis. He couldn’t think straight and his speak was unintelligible. He kept sputtering about an Autobot coup and how the Autobots tried to offline their leader. Starscream was extremely attentive to the Prime as he was being treated in the medbay. He visited often, almost three times a day, and would threaten any vehicons who got too close to the prime. If Shockwave didn’t know any better, he’d suggest that the seeker was-

 

“Are you concerned for the Prime?” Shockwave asked in his monotone voice.

 

“What!?” Starscream snarled in disgust as if he’s been accused of some reprehensible crime.

 

“He lost most of his energon, including a vital amount of innermost energon. I have been pumping his body with fluids in an effort to restore his circulatory functions.”

 

“Yes,”Starscream recoiled at the memory of Optimus’ mangled frame,” I am well aware.”

 

“His condition was fatal when he first arrived in the medbay, the only thing keeping Optimus Prime alive was the matrix. It will be a miracle if he survives this incident,”Shockwave continued.

 

“I’m still not certain of what you are suggesting.”

 

“The Prime is our enemy but our master wishes to keep him alive. Ever since his arrival aboard the Nemesis you attentive….almost protective of the Prime. It would be illogical for you to act in such a manner if you felt no pity for the prime. However, I am still not certain of your motive behind your actions.”

 

“Yes...well  _ you’ve _ been attentive to the needs of the Prime as well now haven’t you,” Starscream snarked,” painfully attentive. You  _ rarely _ let anyone into the medbay and even when you do allow others in you force them to stand in a corner while you work on Optimus! It forces me to question what _ your _ motives are behind helping the prime?”

 

“My motives are pure Starscream,” Shockwave moved from Optimus’ side until he was directly in front of the seeker, practically pinning him to the medbay walls, “my only concern is performing my duties and ensuring the speedy recovery of Optimus Prime. You, however, have made a name for yourself as one who wishes to overthrow our leader and take command of the Decepticon army. It is only logical for me to assume that your intentions are for your own personal gain.”

 

“YOU THINK THIS IS ABOUT ME!” Starscream’s voice screeched forcing Shockwave to cover his audio receptors. “Optimus Prime was found fallen off the side of a cliff for primus-sake! Despite the differences within our factions, I recognize that Prime is a kind and benevolent leader towards the Autobots, he would never harm anyone on his team nor would he torture an injured decepticon. I know our leader very well Shockwave, I am his second in command. Megatron is not the leader Optimus Prime is, he is cruel and vengeful. Once the Prime’s internal functions reach stable levels, Megatron will spend his time torturing Optimus to his spark’s content and I would expect nothing less of our leader. However, I would never expect such cruelty from an Autobot towards their own leader. When I found Optimus Prime he was lying face down at the base of the cliff meaning that someone had snuck up from behind and pushed him off. Why would any “good-natured” Autobot attempt to offline such a warm-sparked leader and in such a dishonorable manner. Not even Megatron himself would stoop so low as to attack Prime from behind without even alerting him first of his presence.”

 

“You’re rambling Starscream?”

 

“I’m not rambling you incompetent oaf! We are dealing with an Autobot more cruel and devious than our own leader, this is a dangerous situation!”

 

“There is no logic behind your words,” Shockwave replied as he turned away from the seeker and back to his console. Starscream stood with his intakes slightly ajar dumbfounded by the purple mech’s demeanor. 

 

“No logic? What happens when the Autobot who tried to snuff Prime’s spark comes after Megatron? Prime fought with honor, this autobot-”

 

“Fights like you?” Shockwave sighed as he continued to type on the console. Irritation was beginning to seep into his field though he did his best to restrain it. Starscream was not as restrained, however, and continued to berate Shockwave.

 

“You’ll see you single opticed freak! When that fragged autobot tried to usurp the rule of Lord Megatron, then you’ll see my logic.”

 

Starscream stormed out of the medbay leaving Shockwave in silence.


	4. Update

Hey guys,

First off: I am NOT abandoning this work!!!!!

Thank you so much for supporting me and reading my fanfiction. I haven't been writing Transformers fanfiction for very long and I've been working to make my writing better. I really enjoy the concept and idea of this specific work, however, I feel as if I rushed into it a bit quickly instead of thinking this out. I want you all to know that I will be continuing this in the future, but I'm going to rework it first before I post it again. I want to publish the best content possible and I feel like this isn't my best. I'll update this again when I finally finish this work, but don't expect to see anything soon. I'm sorry about not writing another chapter like I said before I want to publish the best content possible and I feel like if I take my time to work on this then I'll make something that is really good.

Thank you all so much and have a good night.


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